right now #4 | soft sad music for no reason??? but it’s pretty??? + Black Veil Brides

Salve

Today is another day. And I feel the same as I have the rest of the days. And this is another playlist post of songs that are sad and soft for no particular reason other than that’s what i’m listening to currently. Which is fun. Anyway, let’s begin.


The entire playlist is right HERE if you would like to listen to it, it’s about 6 hours long which is great and yes. Now, my favourites:

  • 99 Red Balloons | Sleeping at Last
  • Already Gone | Sleeping at last
  • Better | Ben Platt (his entire album is another thing I’ve had on repeat)
  • Brother | Kodaline
  • coffee | beabadoobee
  • Creep | Daniela Andrade
  • Fallen Angels | Black Veil Brides
  • Fire on Fire | Same Smith
  • Fix You | Coldplay
  • I Feel Nothing | Openside (NZ band, non-binary lead singer named Possum, amazing band)
  • I Will Be Okay | Mimi
  • I’m a Ruin | MARINA
  • In Case You Don’t Live Forever | Ben Platt
  • Leave the City | Twenty One Pilots
  • Lonely | Dandelion Hands
  • Lullaby | Simi
  • The Moon Song – Live | Karen O
  • My Immortal | Madilyn Baily
  • She | dodie
  • Silly Girl | chloe moriondo
  • Spaceland | chloe moriondo
  • Temporary Nothing | mxmtoon
  • The Mortician’s Daughter | Black Veil Brides
  • Party Tattoos | dodie

And that, my sweets, is the end of that. We have finished April’s playlist.

Do you know any of these songs? Do you like them? Do you have any recommendations for me? What are you listening to? I’d love to know in the comments!!!

ta-ta!
emily xo

a writing rant at 11pm ie emily fails miserably at life | adventures in writing

Hello my children.

this is going to be me ranting at y’all about the struggle i am having trying (and failing) to write an actual outline to my novel and possibly come up with some actual plot ideas. i hope you enjoy.

as another note. this is going to be written without capital letters because i’m using my tablet and it takes too long to try and work it out like that. so yes. have fun reading this fun lil rant-y thing i’ve compiled for y’all!


i just wanted cute gays to get together. and sweet trans kids to be accepted. but i also wanted stabby things. and sparkles. like, jewel sparkles. and gold sparkles. or sparkly stabby things for cute trans gays. also, i wanted nature in there. I wanted some tension in there. and also some stars and flowers. just because i like those things. and if i could include some kind of paper plane too that’d be fun. like,,,they go and like,,,communicate to each other through like,,,paper planes. anyway. but there must also be some death. but not too much death. or blood. i want some kinda soft angst. and then some really not soft at all angst. but you cannot get that actual balance right because it’s like,,,difficult and i don’t like,,,have the patience to like,,,learn to skills of that. anyway. i also want some cute gayness. and i need some levels of vulnerability for the characters to be created. i want some silly sword fighting. but also characters not getting along. but also huge gun battles and gunshots shrieking through the sky and exploding in the dust on the other side of a battle field. i need some silly moments when everyone is just sitting around laughing and having fun. and then others when they’re all in tears and it’s just raw and sad and awful. i want it to feel like there are times when the entire world is ending because i’m struggling to write so much and the characters are mimicking what i’m feeling and it’s just awful. but then it all carries on. OH! and i want music in there,,,like,,,one of them playing music but,,,like,,,the others not knowing. and then they find out. and they’re like,,,super impressed. and it’s something soft like a flue or a piano or something and everyone is super like,,,shocked and it’s real nice. there needs to be some amount of heartbreak and then reparation (is that a word? (it is now)) of said heart. i want sweet and tender moments followed by moments or chaos and urgency. i want war but then also like,,,calm. i want pirates and gangs and guns and things without being clique and copying every other story line around. i want beautiful characters who love each other so intensely it isn’t funny. but then i want them to also hate each other with a passion. i want characters who grow together and learn to love each other as cute gays. i want teasing and flirting and blushing. i want others to ship the pair together but on the dl. but i don’t want it to become so much like that that it become a freaking romance or a fanfiction,,,because that’s like,,,very boring. i want to to be cute without being too cute. i want this to have moments when someone is just screaming and ranting and super upset and angry and someone else is just listening and doing something else and just like,,,nodding every now and then. i want them to have to make adult decisions at a young age and be forced to give up things they really don’t want to then. but i also want them to be children like,,,five minutes later and just be like,,,joking and playing about and shit. i want them to be loved by everyone but also like,,,piss everyone off so much they hate them all and are like,,,nope. not dealing with you today. i just wanted it all to go to plan

AND DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD THAT IS TO DO??? ESPECIALLY THAT LAST PART??? IT’S INSANE AND I DON’T GET IT OR LIKE IT OR ANYTHING.


so, that’s my little rant over. i hope you enjoyed it and actallly felt some of my struggles as a writer having to deal with cutting all those ideas down into something that hasn’t been done a thousand times over and is actually good! it’s all going great so far, i’m not really annoyed about the fact that i have no actual plot and just have characters who i’m not giving up for anything. not. at. all.

anyway, if you’re a writer, do tell me about your struggles. also your novel ideas. and whether you’re doing camp NaNoWriMo this month (i’m not). and anything else you want to talk to about your novel, do so!

and if you’re not a writer, that’s cool too. just talk to me about how your life is, what you’re doing. what your hobbies are. the like, the like.

have a good night children.
emily xo