I’m ready to reveal myself online! More than I ALREADY HAVE!!! This’ll be very awkward.
So, for 300 followers (we have over 320 now!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!) I’m going to completely reveal myself in this 100 Truths Tag that I have seen several times. Most recently on May’s blog. So, thanks May for this, it was great to read about your life and I’m now gonna do the same!
Before I begin, I would like to add a disclaimer in here because some of these thing could be controversial. This is all my opinion. I do not want anyone to get offended or upset. Everything I write in these next few questions is all what I think and I totally get that several people have different beliefs, I’m more than happy with that.
1. what’s your name?
Emily. It’s my real name 100%, I haven’t changed it for here.
2. any nicknames or aliases?
Nothing much, sometimes Em.
3. your gender?
Genderqueer/agender. I don’t really know what I am but I consider myself agender or questioning. I use they/them pronouns.
4. your star sign?
Cancer. I should be a Gemini though, given all the tests out there that I’ve taken.
5. how old are you?
14. I’m a young human. AND I’M PROUD OF IT. I have had a lot of people tell me I come across a lot older than that, but I am 14. Really.
6. your relationship status?
Contrary to popular belief, I’m single. I almost had a girlfriend but no such luck #demiromantic issues.
7. any children?
I’M 14, ACE AND SINGLE. NO. I ALSO DO NOT WISH TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE FUTURE.
8. any pets?
Too many to count, but the rabbits are my favourites. I love them so much.
9. any piercings or tattoos?
Normal lobe piercings in both ears and a cartilage piercing in my right one. No tattoos.
10. what do you like about yourself?
My maths brain, by art skills, my eyes and my flexibility. Um, I think that’s it.
11. what do you dislike about yourself?
My chest, my hips, my dysphoria…what else do you want? I’m a severely dysphoric, mentally ill person, I don’t like much about myself. As listed above.
12. righty or lefty?
Righty for writing, lefty for most other things, kicking, jumping, throwing. I do most things with the left side of my body.
13. last thing you drunk:
I really don’t know, water probably?
14. last thing you ate:
Strawberries. Yummy, sweet, juicy strawberries, the first of the season. I ate three of them. They tasted very good.
15. your last phone call:
*checks* I don’t call many people, but my father on Thrusday at 7:17am.
16. your last text message:
I don’t text often, but my last message I sent was to a friend saying “thank you for the hot people”.
17. your last email:
I emailed Elizabeth last night in reply to an email about my last post.
18. the last song you listened to:
Luv Song by Chloe Moriondo which is amazing. You should go check her out, she has amazing music and is really young and sweet. Luv Song is great.
19. the last book you read:
Um, War Storm by Victoria Aveyard. Look out for the review coming soon, it was great book and I really hope it’s not the end of the series!
20. the last time you cried:
Monday when I had a huge anxiety attack and was just too stressed and upset to do life. It was not much fun.
21. the last blog you read:
The darling Starling @ Starling.
22. the last person you spoke to:
Either my mum or sister, but I think the latter.
23. the last place you visited:
What? Is this like the last place I went? If so, school yesterday.
24. your last holiday abroad:
I’ve never been overseas, so nowhere. Not applicable.
HAVE YOU EVER:
25. have you ever got back together with an ex?
No, I have never had a partner, let alone an ex.
26. have you ever been cheated on?
No, I have never had a partner.
27. have you ever cheated on anyone?
No, I reiterate the fact that I HAVE NEVER HAD A PARTNER!
28. have you ever lost someone special to you?
Yes, my old best friends (two of them) and my grandmother.
29. have you ever been so drunk you threw up?
No, I’ve never drunk, never been drunk
and even if I had I could not admit it on here where my parents can see. No.
30. have you ever fallen out of love with someone?
Nope. Never fallen into love with someone either.
31. have you ever met someone who changed you?
I guess so, most of my friends have had some kind of huge impact on me. I don’t know if I’d say they’ve changed me though…
32. have you ever been in a situation where you found out who your real friends are?
Yes, a couple of times, mostly this year after opening up and coming out and losing a few friends who didn’t want to be around me like that. It was hard but it got better.
33. have you ever kissed someone you probably shouldn’t have?
I’ve never actually kissed someone, so nope.
34. have you ever found out people were talking about you behind your back?
Oh, on several occasions! I don’t really care though, it’s not worth worrying too much about.
35. have you ever broken someone’s heart?
I don’t know? I kinda hope not?!
36. have you ever kissed a stranger?
37. have you ever had your own heart broken?
No? Well I’ve felt like I’d die when a couple of my OTP’s didn’t happen in books (looking at you Wolfstar), but not really, no.
38. have you ever had sex on the first date?
- NO, I’M ASEXUAL.
- NO, I’M UNDERAGE.
- NO, BUT IN RED AND BOLD TO MAKE A POINT.
39. have you ever been arrested?
No, I’ve been in police cars though. But no. I’m too scared to do anything too bad.
40. have you ever been attracted to someone that isn’t the gender you usually find attractive?
I’m demi and have only had one crush (I was 10) so I wouldn’t really know, but no. I do find several (gay male) cosplayers attractive though. Never been attracted to people really.
41. have you ever done something you regret?
Heck of a lot of things. For example, not getting help with my mental issues earlier.
42. have you ever had a threesome?
- NO, I’M ASEXUAL.
- NO, I’M UNDERAGE.
- NO, BUT IN RED AND BOLD TO MAKE A POINT.
43. have you ever embarrassed yourself in public?
Oh, several times!
44. have you ever misjudged someone?
Yes, I misjudged several of my really good friends as snobbish brats at the start of the year and several snobbish brats as lovely people. I don’t think anyone can say no to this, we all misjudge people, we just shouldn’t judge people.
YOUR BELIEFS & OPINIONS
45. do you believe in God?
No, I’m an atheist. I don’t want anyone to get offended. I don’t believe in a God but think that people are 100% entitled to their own opinions, beliefs and views and I will not criticise anyone for these.
46. do you believe in yourself?
Not usually, but sometimes.
47. do you believe in Santa Claus?
Haven’t since I was about 7. Sorry Santy.
48. do you believe in ghosts?
I don’t know. There is definitely some supernatural being out there, maybe ghosts, maybe not? So I guess I believe in ghosts?
49. do you believe in aliens?
Again, I don’t know. We have such a FREAKING HUGE UNIVERSE that it’s almost impossible for there not to be anything else out there. I really think that there is something else out there, maybe not aliens, but something. Like the ghosts.
50. do you believe in miracles?
Yes. I don’t even know what to say about this. But yes, I do believe in miracles.
51. do you believe in the power of positive thinking?
Yes. If you completely change your thought processes to positive thoughts and eradicate all traces of negativity from your brain you WILL feel better. It works really well for me in both depressive and anxious moments.
52. do you believe in love at first sight?
Not as a demi, but maybe for others? I don’t think so though, definitely in attraction at first sight though. (for others too)
53. can money make you happy?
Yes! Money can buy you books and help that can make you happier. It can really impact on you in a positive way. But other things can make you happy for free too. Like friends and animals and art.
54. would you describe yourself as a feminist?
Yes. Yes, yes yes. 100%. I want gender equality and don’t understand the people out there who don’t.
55. are you pro-life or pro-choice?
Pro-choice. I believe that you have the ability to choose what you want and what is good for you. Whatever I had chosen here I would have got hate for it. This also doe not mean that I am all for abortion, I just believe that people should be able to have the choice to deal with their own life.
56. do you have strong political beliefs?
Not really? I try to avoid politics at all costs but it’s rather hard. I do believe in certain things and do have a political party that I support completely, but politics is a very difficult, touchy subject and is often easier to just stay right out of.
57. do you have strong religious beliefs?
No. I don’t feel any connection to any religion. I’m not a religious person at all.
58. what do you think the most important thing you can give a child is?
Love, support, care and validation! A child will thrive if you give them the things they so desperately want. If you want a child to do well you have to give them the things that you would like. The things that you would thrive on.
59. are you eating anything right now?
60. are you drinking anything right now?
61. what are you listening to right now?
My workout playlist which is kind of weird given that I’m lying on my bed being lazy! But Geronimo by Sheppard is currently playing in the background.
62. what are you thinking about right now?
Why I just sent a message to someone saying that I was happy about something and they sent back “Well I’m always here to help you if you’re having a hard time, poor, poor you.” and how I’m managing to hack the Instagram messaging system and send multiple hearts at once.
63. what are you waiting for right now?
The rain to stop so I can get on with my life.
64. what are you most excited about right now?
THE NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS FOR A BIG SCHOOL-BASED COMPETITION THAT COULD TAKE US TO SYDNEY THAT’S ON NEXT SATURDAY!
65. what’s your pet hate right now?
That I’m wearing a cropped top and my stomach is revealed, that the WiFi is shit and that the rain won’t stop and has been going on since about Tuesday.
66. what’s your favorite thing right now?
Um, my amazing faux-mink blanket that I’ve got draped across me and have had for the last 2 hours I’ve been writing for.
67. if you weren’t answering these questions, what would you be doing right now?
Homework or procrastinating it by watching YouTube or messaging my friends.
68. your first best friend:
If I remember correctly a boy called George who I spent the first 5 years of my life with being babysat by him mum when my parents were at work.
69. your first kiss:
Never had one.
70. your first celebrity crush:
It’s kinda weird, but also shows my demiromanticness, but my first celebrity crush is this year on Bex Taylor-Klaus who is incredibly hot and has the most beautiful eyes and an amazing voice. They’re my first crush since my first one on my best friend’s sister when I was 10. And it’s a celebrity crush, so doesn’t count.
71. your first holiday:
How would I know?!
72. your first pet:
We had a dog called Stoli, another called Fish and a cat called Monster when I was born, so them? Else I owned my own dog called Rosie when I was 4.
73. your first regret:
Um, who knows?!
74. your first job:
I have a half job washing towels and doing a stocktake now, so that I guess?
WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE?
76. love or money?
Platonic love is amazing. I don’t think I could deal with the pressure I would feel was on me with romantic love, but love over money any day.
77. twitter or facebook?
Neither, but Twitter I guess?
78. hook up or relationship?
79. dogs or cats?
80. coffee or tea?
Herbal tea. Coffee and I had a bad run in a while back in which I stayed up all night after drinking 3 coffees and throwing up several times. I spent the night shaking. It put me off for life.
Although…sweetened almond-soy milk lattes are very good.
81. beer or wine?
Neither. They’re both gross and sour and bitter and I would highly recommend that anyone currently drinking them stops right now.
82. sweet or savory?
Depends how I’m feeling, what I’m craving, how my eating’s going and what I’ve already eaten. But usually sweet.
83. introvert or extrovert?
Extrovert at heart but introverted by mental illnesses. Also it depends who I’m around. So probably ambivert?
84. vampires or werewolves?
Vampires if I had to choose one.
85. seaside or countryside?
Seasides are pretty but I have an irrational fear of the ocean, so countryside.
86. summer or winter?
Autumn. But winter I guess out of these two.
87. books or movies?
BOOKS OF COURSE. WHOEVER MADE UP THIS TAG IS AN IDIOT. (no offence!)
88. horror or comedy?
Horror completely. But there are so many books and movies I haven’t dealt with yet that I must… *cackles evilly*
RANDOM QUESTIONS TO FINISH ON
89. do you wish you could change your past?
I can’t change what has already happened. I feel that dwelling on the past has a huge negative impact on me as a person (talking to YOU anxiety). But if I could change one thing it would be not giving up on certain people as early as I did. There are several smaller things that I wish I could change too, but that’s okay.
What has happened, has happened,
What has been, has been,
And those are the facts,
Even if never forseen.
~ Some dude in one of my stories
90. what’s your dream job?
A psychologist. I would love to be a psychologist. I really want to deal with the brain and help people out of their struggles. I want to find out more about mental illnesses and stuff like that. It all really intrigues me.
91. what’s your guilty pleasure?
Lots of things. Lying in bed not doing anything, not thinking anything, under my mink blanket is right up there.
92. what are you afraid of?
A few things. Losing the people I hold dear to me, oceans and moths for example.
93. what was the first thing you wanted to be when you grew up?
Who knows? I think probably something like a hairdresser or a horserider maybe?
94. if you could have any superpower, what would it be?
SHAPESHIFTING! OUT OF MY WAY DYSPHORIA! MY SHAPESHIFTING TALENTS ARE HERE TO REMOVE YOU FROM MY BODY COMPLETELY! I would love that a lot.
95. if you could change anything about your life what would it be?
I would remove all my mental illnesses, disorders and issues from my life. It would be very…freeing. And also, I would like to get rid of all my stresses about pleasing my friends.
96. would you want immortality?
No way. I couldn’t deal with living forever, not being able to do anything. I can’t imagine watching everyone I love dying off around me while I just watch on, that’s one of my biggest fears. Also, just watching the world fall into disrepair would be so hard.
97. if you could interview anyone alive or dead who would you choose?
My parents and friends. I would like to know more about them. WATCH THIS SPACE, THERE SHOULD BE AN INTERVIEW WITH A FAMILY MEMBER SOMETIME SOON!
98. would you say you are happy?
Now? I’m mildly content. I have nothing going on right now and have just got things off my chest. In general? I’ve kind of just worked out a way to numb my body so I don’t really feel much in terms of pain or emotions. I’m pretty (as I say to EVERYONE ALL THE TIME) ‘meh’. I’m fine. I’m not good, not bad. Not happy, not sad. Just numb so I can’t feel the pain of the small triggers.
99. what one piece of advice would you give to yourself at age eighteen?
Well, I’m 14, so I’ll give my future self some advice.
Stay alive. Keep living.
Hold onto your friends. Remember your family.
~ Emily to their 18 year old self.
Can I do this to myself at age eight? Actually, I wrote a letter to my younger self about six months ago that I’ll publish at some point on here.
100. where would you like to be in five years’ time?
Happy, free of mental illness (we can dream) and still with amazing friends. Also, in university studying to become a psychologist. (refer to a part in this post for more on this sort of thing but in 10 years)
Holy heck! That was a very long post! I’m seriously very sorry! If you’ve read to the end, thank you so much, it really means a lot that you have read through this ENTIRE 3000 WORD POST! This must be one of my longest posts ever! It also took me over three hours to write. And I somehow managed to write it all in one sitting??? How does that work???
So thanks for getting to the end! What are your opinions on these topics? Thanks again for 300 followers! I’m so happy and y’all mean a lot to me!
Like, comment, smile, look after yourself and share the love. My DMs are always open.